Do you recall elementary school and some kids just being so rude- often teasing each other over things beyond their control? I recall at recess all sorts of knee-slapper remarks about people's height (or lack of it), their athletic prowess (or their comedic ability to trip over their two left feet daily), their hair color or style, the kids they sat by in class even though the seats were assigned, heck even the appearance of our mothers (cue the yo' momma remarks).
Then after tattling for the seventh time to your teacher on the recess bench about what John said to Jamie, our teachers back then would have us repeat to ourselves that old saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me".
Can I just be honest? Ugh- that statement gets under my skin in all the wrong ways. The truth is that our words have power:
Our words can uplift someone going through one of life's hardest battles, often encouraging them with scripture, prayer, or a thinking of you card.
Our words can completely deflate child when we shout aloud at the mess they made in the kitchen that day attempting to be America's next greatest baker.
Our words can annoy someone to their wits end during a cross country family trip ("stop touching me" and "are we there yet" get me nearly every time).
Our words can bring cheer, joy, laughter, and all the happy tears as we share a funny inside joke or tell stories of our loved ones in heaven.
I recently attended a women's retreat with a wonderful group of women. They are dynamic, passionate, faith-filled, life- giving, beautiful, and fierce momma bears (no really, you wouldn't want to mess with their babies).
During one of the sessions, we we were asked to be silent and listen for three minutes and jot down any impressions or anything we heard from God about one of the ladies in the group. After the three minutes we each shared what we heard. The only rule was that anything we shared must be encouraging.
Around the circle, we each took a turn sharing what we individually heard for "Momma K" (and then repeated the whole process again for "Momma L" then "Momma M" and so on). As we started sharing, jaws dropped and tears began to fall. It was truly astonishing to hear and see the the strings of words, pictures, themes, objects, and versus that were intertwined as each women shared what she heard from God or felt impressed upon her heart to share.
It was something out of this world- almost as if the ladies listening had all subconsciously met before this exercise and agreed on what they would say. Again and again as each women shared, the women front and center would tear up in astonishment at how in tune the words and stories shared where so poetic, direct, and personally applicable to her life and everything going on in it. Suddenly all the worries, pain, frustrations, and heartaches of life came front and center. Yet they were all met with grace, words of encouragement, affirmations of things hoped for, and that above all else God was communicating to us through other women directly. The words shared that day could very well have moved mountains.
Now if we are honest, we probably need to spend some time (maybe more than just three minutes) reflecting on the words we hear from others and the words we (sometimes not so carefully) throw out there in the universe.
Are the words we say said in love? In kindness? In an encouraging way? At the end of the day, the words we speak matter. And the words others speak to us matter just as much!