As a child, I was often told I was smart and really great in school. A family rule in my home growing up was that we always tried our best. For me, this meant doing everything in my power to get that A on the assignment or test.
Eventually, I became really good at not only studying my butt off to get that precious A. I also became good at studying teachers and how they teach, and how they expect assignments and papers to look, and how and what material they write their tests to.
This skill became pivotal in my college years. Knowing how a college professor grades and tests allows you to tailor your study routines and cram sessions so that you can capitalize on your time for other things in life (family, friends, a job, or hobby).
When my teachers, friends, or family told me I was so smart or gifted in this arena, I often became annoyed and brushed it off… If they really knew how much pressure I put on myself, how much time I studied, how many study habits I formed, how challenging some of the classes or tests were.
Do you know anyone like this? Do you yourself relate? Maybe you have a particular skill or habit you’ve worked on that people recognize in you? And maybe those people chalk it up as a natural talent or gift? When in reality you’ve worked your buns off (maybe quite literally for my fitness friends) to get where you are now?
For me, yet another one of these traits people recognize in me is my “natural ability to encourage others”. In my friend groups and even in the workplace I’m recognized not as a ray of sunshine, but buckets full of sunshine. Always so smiley, so positive, and so encouraging.
Why yes, God may have orchestrated some talents, traits, or gifts in me to encourage the people around me. But if I’m really honest with you, it’s also been a journey of self discovery, determination, grit, faithfulness, and a whole lot of hard work in habit forming.
For me current day, this looks like the following:
Reading every night before bed (a personal book, + a group study book, and three pages of the Bible)
A 4:45 am alarm three days a week to run/train for a 10k, and accountability partners to hold me to it.
A 7:15 am alarm daily to read a devotional, a daily bible verse, and pray for my friends and family, then texting those I prayed for to let them know
Writing for my blog weekly on Sundays, and a habit contract (I owe some close friends Starbucks $ if I fail to write each Sunday)
Re-training my brain several times a day that everything is a “get to” and nothing is a “have to” (e.g., I get to work today, I get to be faithful today, I get to do the laundry today, I get to workout today)
A work calendar reminder every Thursday to remind me to encourage and remind my coworkers how amazing they are
A Bible study/Women’s group every Friday with 5 very close friends where I can be vulnerable and receive prayer
Serving in church every Sunday in our children’s ministry, making sure our volunteers have everything they need before and during service, stepping into leading classrooms, and encouraging grown ups and kiddos in the hallways and classrooms
For me being positive, faith filled, and a pocket full of sunshine is a choice. It is taking time, hard work, effort, endurance, sacrifices, and accountability for my actions.
So if you see someone today where something just comes “easy” for them, I want to challenge your thinking. Most likely, that person has been through some hardships, has lived a little, and has had to work hard to get to the place they are now.
We really have no idea how those persons gifts and talents came to be. Yes, maybe they have received a gift from God. But that doesn’t mean they had to hone in on it, work hard to perfect it, or file off the many sharp edges.
In other cases it may not have been a God given gift at all. It may have been something they truly had to build in themselves from the ground up. They endured something hard, had to learn a new habit, work at it for months or years, and have overcome something big and mastered their skill or trait.
So let’s count our blessings and not take things for granted. If you see something in someone, express your gratitude and don’t try to sugar coat or make light of it as a gift. Truly appreciate them for what they are contributing to make your life, your workplace, your church, or the world a better place.
“I will make them and the places surrounding my hill a blessing. I will send down showers in season; there will be showers of blessing.”
Ezekiel 34:26